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Neil Gaiman
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The Problem with Saints
I wish Joan of Arc wouldn't hang around the park
Pronouncing that she won't get burned again
Her armor's very shiny and her message is divine
But I wish she'd take a day off now and then
She said：
It clears your head when you come back from the dead
With your sword as sharp as anything that cuts
And to prove it she bisected three young tourists from Utrecht
Which rapidly displayed a lot of guts
She says we need to raise a brand new army
And the flag of France so proudly she'll unfold
She said
The people that she hated will be neatly bifurcated
And the British will no longer rule the world
She says it was a mistake to let them burn her at the stake
And she learned a lesson back there in the flames
So she'll going to kill the queen
And then she'll rescue old Orleans
And it's really hard to hand around with saints
I think I ought to tell her that the English left in failure
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And they don't go back to France except on hols
But I saw her vivisect a man who wanted to correct her
And soon the playground resembled Grand Guignol
She says we need to raise a brand new army
Then she marched us round until we couldn't stand
She says the nation she abhors will soon be writhing on the floor
And the British will no longer rule her land
And she's waiting for the dauphin
Who will come across the sea
And knows that God agrees with her complaints
So I'm hoping she'll ignore my English accent in her war
'Cause it's really hard to hang around with saints
She says we need to raise a brand new army
And the flag of France so proudly she'll unfold
She says the people she hated will be nearly bifurcated
The British will no longer rule
The British will no longer rule the
The British will no longer rule the world!
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